Venom – Trailer 2 Reaction: This movie looks terrible.

By no means is a trailer indicative of the final product. Its an ad. Venom could be good, but impressions from the teaser, first trailer and second trailer leave me expecting an awful mess. I’d love to be wrong, but… jeez it looks like Sony went and Sony’d all over a Spider-Man movie again.

Forgive if I ramble, but it looks cheap and schlocky. Maybe its the suit. Maybe its because it gives me edge-lord “I’m So HaRdCoRe” vibes. Maybe its because it looks like its a Zack Snyder movie with that washed out visual palette.

There are some promising badass things: ripping the face is badass, the axe hands are badass, the big tongue is badass, having all the Hybrid symbiotes on their own is badass.

But there are some dumbass things: indistinguishable character design is dumbass, the goofy Venom face worming itself off the body to have a chat is dumbass, the “ima eat u” monologue is dumbass.

I just look at this and wonder if anyone is excited to watch this CGI fight at night between a black symbiote with no distinguishable markings versus a dark grey symbiote with no distinguishable markings? If it wasn’t for someone telling me who was who in this still I would not have known.

I feel as if the film going to suffer from what plagued Suicide Squad: combat and plot better off meant for an R rating but neutered for PG-13, and then a #bigdumb CGI ending because that’s in the recipe book for comic movies.

It just feels off.

The concept is interesting enough. Maybe it is Actually Good. Or maybe its such a bad schlocky mess it takes the needle so far below zero it comes back around to a ten.

I’m not too familiar with director Reuben Fleischer. His IMDB isn’t inspiring but there have been a lot of directors with meh previous work who have come into big budget action flicks and done well. The cinematographer worked on Black Swan, Requiem For A Dream and Pi so you can expect some interesting and weird camera work that could be hella neat.

But like, come on. Its Sony. The studio that couldn’t keep Adam Sandler happy enough to be his exclusive studio. The studio that bungled Venom once before. The studio that bungled Spider-Man so badly, twice, that they just gave most of the property back to a rival studio just to have the public not hate Spider-Man anymore. The studio that made Ghosbusters 2016 and banked on it being the start of a cinematic universe.

Or maybe its good and writing this was a waste of everyone’s time. Guess we’ll figure out on October 5th.

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Deadpool 2 Doesn’t Care About Anything

Deadpool 2

If you can forgive me for a hot minute here, Deadpool 2 gives no fucks.

I apologise so much. Please forgive me for using one bad word in this review of a movie that drops a bad word per minute.

Do you know if this movie is better than the first one? I don’t, and I don’t think the movie cares to be better or worse. It just wants to be the new Deadpool movie. This is a Guardians 1 vs Guardians 2 thing. So its good but I don’t know if its better but it could be but it could not be but it totally could be.

One thing that is important to remember is that this is an R rated comedy first and an R rated action movie second with super “hero” syrup all over and inside its crevices.

If you liked Deadpool then you’ll like Deadpool 2. Simple. If you weren’t a fan of the first one, well I guess it depends why but DP2 probably won’t tickle your jimmies. There is all the swearing, brutal violence, blood, dismemberment, jokes, irreverence and meta-references that you would expect. Every scene with a serious tone is completely cut out by jokes, but this is still a bit more of a movie with plot and characters and motivation and all that sort of jazz. Definitely tried a little harder to make more of a narrative than “guy kills dude to save girlfriend”.

After seeing so many super hero movies that were massive in scale with save the world/change the world/save the universe level plots across X-Men, the MCU and the DCEU, its nice change to get a self contained, small, this-only-matters-to-these-characters level stories. The stakes are really only relevant to those on-screen. Sure, there might be some larger implications if you really think about it, but they’re never stated. The implications that are stated are small time, but that makes the stakes personal and better for a plot involving a bunch of selfish characters.

Its also nice to have a movie that doesn’t take itself seriously in a time where most blockbusters with ridiculous premises are also trying to be like “BUT THIS IS REAL LIFE!”

Deadpool and Ant-Man is a team up I want to see.

They made a great creative use of Deadpool’s powers in the first film, and with an expanded cast they really find more ways to do it again. Domino is a lot of fun. Thanos Josh Brolin Cable is a nice piece of seriousness in a film that dances with the absurd. The kiddos, Colossus and SPOILER all do their thing. TJ Miller disappears frequently which I don’t think will have anyone shedding tears.

I feel like the stuff that they were like “oh yeah this’ll be funny” didn’t land quite as hard as they wanted. There are jokes that are really like “THIS IS A JOKE JOKE” but some of the more mundane jokes and moments were some of the best. The cameos were fun.

I’m curious how much of a movie like this is subtly satire or if they lucked into a few things working themselves out between wrapping the film and then world/cinema/AVENGERS stuff happening. Or maybe I’m totally overthinking some parts.

Some of the funniest parts of the movie were technically after the movie in the after-credits. Make sure you catch those. There isn’t a post-credits so just stick around like 3 minutes.

The soundtrack to the movie is a lot of fun and adds to the overall tone and atmosphere they’re going for. This song is fire.

Ranking rating: One and a half thumbs up out of two thumbs up. If you can still catch it in theatre, aim for a Friday/Saturday/Tuesday crowd as it’ll be more fun with a crowd. If not then have a brownie and enjoy it on demand or Blu-Ray.

Brill-Ant: Ant-Man and The Wasp rules pretty hard

ant man and the wasp

They don’t appreciate my pun.

Who cares about Thanos? What’s an intifininininity stone? Why is Gamora? None of this matters in this movie and it makes the movie effing great. Legit.

You need an absolute zero sum of Marvel knowledge walking into this movie. Outside of a few “Captain America” name drops this movie exists on it’s own to the point this could be the first entry to Ant-Man and not the first Ant-Man film.

I love Infinity War as a movie. Its #actuallygood and it’s also nuts because I never thought I’d ever see something like that happen when I was a little Adam Junior playing Spiderman at the playground. But having side stories that aren’t part of the Thanos saga keeps this franchise fresh and enjoyable and worth seeing between tentpoles.

I wasn’t too hyped coming into this movie and didn’t even intend to see it until about an hour before I did. It was raining out and it felt like my only choice on Netflix was The Last Jedi and I noped out of that.

I liked the first Ant-Man movie just fine. It was good. It was basically the first Marvel movie to not be a big epic and you can probably credit it, and Guardians Vol 1, as the point where Marvel opened up to adapting other genres into their hero films and giving more agency to the director’s own vision.

The first film tried to be a heist movie and generally came close but for the goofy action ending. This film isn’t too far off being a “pure” heist movie featuring a shrinking-growing hero and a shrinking-flying hero and a ghost lady plus science talk with old science peeps. The action scenes aren’t so much fight scenes as they are chase scenes or not-get-caught scenes with action sprinkles and explosion icing.

The cast is great. The big names all have great chemistry and truly own some scenes. The little girl child isn’t annoying and is legitimately charming. Michael Pena rules. TI is TI. The fake Russian guy character acts the crap off being a character actor. Asian Jim (Randall Park) is a lot of fun as the FBI agent. The evil gangsters really make their screen time work. Ghost Out Of Her Shell does her part.

I basically watched the whole movie with a smile on my face. I was laughing out loud frequently. They make great use of pacing and tone to keep things fun. There is a lot more made of the fun you can have with shrinking and bigging for gags and creative action. Its refreshing to see things in a super hero movie that involve more guile and cunning than just punch punch super kick.

If we’re being entirely honest, I probably put this movie at or even above Black Panther in terms of Fun Watchingness. It doesn’t have any of the cultural weight or anything meta that Black Panther brought, but if I’m just looking to watch something for 2 hours and these are both on Netflix its a real coin toss.

Even if you’re like my vegan friend who hates everything fun if it involves a super hero because of the inherent dumbness, give this a try since its more along the lines of a Honey I Shrunk The Kids than The Dark Knight.

Stay for for the mid credits scene. The post credits is whatever because I don’t even remember it.

Ranking rating: Double Thumbs Up Recommend. Go see. It isn’t critical to the Marvel Universe, but it doesn’t have to be and that’s why its so good. And as with any comedy, see it in a theatre with peeps.

Paging Doctor Mister Strange. Your Origin Story Is Here

Doctor Strange 4.4/5

I’m not sure how often I’ve mentioned it in a review here, but I really hate that all movies now have to be a minimum of two hours. When movies drag out it is super lame. What ever happened to the 90 minute movie?

What does this have to do with anything? Well, Marvel went and made themselves a two hour movie that felt like a 90 minute fast paced, tripping balls, action movie and it rocked. I’m positive that the 1h55m run time listed on IMDB is a lie.

Benedict Cumberbatch’s American accent was not distracting. He was also good at being Doctor Strange because Doctor Strange is an asshole, self-centered, boastful, and a bit of a dickbag. He nailed it.

The supporting cast was interesting too.

  • Mordo was more interesting here than any time I’ve read him in the comics. He isn’t just the foil to Doctor Strange in the traditional mirror villain way most comic villains are
  • Wong taking more from the recent Way of the Weird inspiration as an army general was well served and executed. It sets up well for the future films if they continue down the WotW comic story.
  • The Ancient One and her monologues never took too long or felt too… “I’m so ancient and wise” which is so easy to do with the Grandmaster character. I liked how she wouldn’t take more than two or three sentences to ever make her point.

Was the villain a little underdeveloped? I suppose. But he was what he was and they didn’t try to do more. If I was more into spoilers I would go into more here. It’s hard to kinda get into what I want to say without letting it all hang out.

The tie-ins to the greater MCU? Fine. A shot of Avengers Tower with downtown New York? Good, in fact I would have loved to have seen the Oscorp tower too. Off hand mention of the Avengers? Cool. Blah blah Infinity Stones? Yeah duh.

I also liked things that were designed to be more character moments too. Complications around The Oath. The roller coaster of his status. Utilitarian vs Individualism was especially fun. I like to thing about the “What Ifs?” in a movie a lot. Like what if the character took the right path and not the left one. Make the renegade choice and and not be a paragon.

The action was well shot and smart. It was “magical” and manipulative. Creative and the use of the environment sets this apart from shoot-bang-kick-smash that most of the Marvel movies do.

The climax was great, smart and interesting on a few levels. I would have liked a little more fire, though (and you’ll understand that once you see it).

The trippy kaleidoscope effects were worth the price of admission. Same with the bright colours and tints and blurs and whatever else. I’m not one who does, but people who partake in certain psychedelics would have a blast about 30 minutes in.

The mid-credits scene was nice. I’m always of two minds on these. Part of me likes when these things are kept almost entirely to their self, but then the part of me who wants to see a 5 hour film of nothing but comic book crossover porn just loves it.

The end-credits scene plays into what we’ve seen from the character and sets up the sequel and maybe a small portion of Infinity War (if you make great leaps of imagination with fan theory that I do).

Would I like to have seen a little more doctor-ing? Sure enough. More Rachel McAdams being a Canadian sweetheart? Yeah. Some more cult time? Sure!

But at the same time, I really enjoy a movie that doesn’t bugger about too much and just keeps things going.

I will see this again. And probably again. Then once more. At least.

Thanks for reading! 🙂

TMNT2: Out Of The Shadows and Into The Cheese

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out Of The Shadows 3/5

It starred the Turtles. They did fun stuff. Gags and one liners. Some heist scenes. They’re decent characters in their own right. Megan Fox, Stephen Amell and will Arnett all get enough screen time to put a smile on your face.

It wasn’t revolutionary film making. The plot wasn’t amazing. But if you grew up a TMNT fan then this is more likely to appeal to you and put a smile on your face than the previous TMNT film.

It is a lot more fantastical and goofy. It embraces that side versus trying to make ninja crime fighting teenage turtles all serious and gritty.

I love the inverse law of ninjas, where “one ninja is an elite and powerful adversary, but multiple ninjas make a group of faceless and incompetent pawns?” The foot clan are as hilariously inept as they were in the cartoon. Shredder is there too, with a way better costume. Bebop and Rocksteady were a lot of fun and Krang was fun too.

I’ve really grown to like the turtle designs. And every time I see Raph I can see Alan Ritchson’s handsome face in there somehow.

It’s hard to call it a “good” movie. There is nothing worthy of an Oscar. Nothing ground breaking.

But it was fun. It was cheesy and fun and unapologetic in being cheesy and fun.

I caught it on a plane so if you’re flying and need to kill under two hours, go for it. If you have kids or were a TMNT fan growing up then its worth a stream on VOD or Netflix.

Previously:
Lazer TeamBlue Mountain State: Rise of ThadlandDeadpoolGods of EgyptBatman v Superman: Dawn of JusticeHardcore HenryJungle BookCaptain America: Civil WarX-Men: ApocalypseMike And Dave Need Wedding DatesGhostbusters, The Legend of TarzanWarcraftPopstar: Never Stop Never Stoppin’Star Trek: BeyondJason Bourne, Suicide SquadLights OutSausage PartyDon’t BreatheKeanuCentral IntelligenceBatman: The Killing Joke

To Come (at some point):
Hell Or Highwater, XOXO (Netflix), Flock of Dudes (September), The Masterpiece (TBA 2016), The Accountant (October), Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (October), Doctor Strange (November), Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (December), Assassins Creed (December)