Adam’s 2014 Summer Movie Takedown

– 300: Rise of an Empire 3/5

Eva Green’s boobs keep it from a 2/5. I really like Eva Green and especially her boobs. Just felt weird being all over the place in time. “Oh, Leonidas from 300? Yeah, he just left” Later: “Yeah Leonidas is dead. Sorry you missed him!” But it was still a decent action flick.

Would have been nice if there was an actual ending.

– Need For Speed 3/5

Generic fast car redemption movie. Won’t watch it again but don’t regret seeing it. Super formulaic. Saw everything coming a mile away. Sure hope Jesse Pinkman signs up for better movies if he wants to get anywhere.

– The Raid 2 3/5

Not as good as the first one. Action was still hard hitting and super nuts though. Not for the squeemish. Took everything from the first movie that worked and did more which should’ve made it better but something was a bit off. Might actually be a 4/5 but a 3/5 compared to the original.

– Captain America: The Winter Soldier 5/5

In my top comic movies of all time. Everything is just so good. Character chemistry, the little things you notice when you’ve seen it twice, not AMERICA MAN: THE MOVIE. Makes me super intrigued into the world of Avengers 2. So much has changed. Widow’s off on her own, Cap’s doing his own thing, no more SHIELD, Tony Stark retired from Iron Man-ing, Odin’s dead, Hawkeye is non-existent.

– Trailer Park Boys: Don’t Legalize it 4/5

It didn’t ruin anything and was funny. Couple little missed things kept it from being 5/5. Felt like a 90 minute episode, which is a good thing. Ending was a little faster than I had expect as far as everything coming together. Great bathroom humour and fans of the TV series will enjoy it more than rando’s looking for a flick.

– The Amazing Spiderman 2 1/5

Marginally better than Spiderman 3. Mish-mash of villains. No big plot, just like 6 subplots slapped together. The plane scene was completely pointless. The whole movie felt like it followed a checklist. Missed opportunity at the end for Miles Morales. SONY made a crappy movie to try and catch up as quickly as possible to Marvel Studios. Same dumb mistake DC is making. Total “part 1 of stuff to come: thanks for spending 15 bucks for nothing of substance but make sure to come back for Venom, Sinister 6 and Carnage!” I get angrier with this movie the more I think about it.

What a piece of shit.

 

To Come

– Godzilla May 16
– X-Men: Days of Future Past May 23
– A Million Ways to Die in the West May 30
– Transformers 4: Age of Extinction June 27
– Hercules July 25
– Guardians of the Galaxy August 1
– Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles August 8
– Batman: Assault on Arkham August 12
– The Expendables 3 August 15
– Sin City: A Dame to Kill For August 22